Color My Life

A picture speaks a thousand words!

Clients often express their feelings using words and it is really hard to grasp the intensity and the prominence of these feelings in their day to day life. Also often clients have a limited emotion vocabulary when asked to express the dominant feelings or how they felt most of the time in thier life.

Color My Life is an art therapy that can be used with one client or with a family system.

Items needed:

1. Feeling Cards or Index Cards with Emotion Labels
2. Crayon or Color Pencil or Paint
3. Drawing Paper

When using with a family system,

• I use the Feelings card and pick out 10-12 commonly experienced feelings (Feelings Cards) by the family member as reported by them.
• I will ask the clients to assign a color to each Feeling Card
• Then I ask the family members to draw a picture (Like a square, circle, rectangle) or any shape they wish to draw and fill the picture/shape to show how much they feel the different emotions.

Assigning colors to the emotions helps when working with a family, since they can all look at the picture and interpret the colors/emotions in a common way.

After the family members complete the art work, I encourage each of them to share their picture and tell the story behind each of their emotions.

Processing the artwork with family members helps to assess the family system and doing the same intervention at the end of the therapy will help to highlight the changes in the family system.

This intervention can also be used with an individual client with the same concept or can also be used to depict a specific issue or situation and how they experience it.

Everything I Know I Learned in My Garden

Life's Lessons in My Own Backyard

By Emily Barned

Begin early, but it is never too late to start.
If it doesn't work, try something else.

Life is fragile. Protect it.
Life is Enduring. Trust it
Life is daily. Water it. Weed it.

Life is indescribably beautiful. Enjoy it and say thank You.
Growth takes time. Be patient. And while you are waiting, pull a weed.
There is something for everybody. Different blooms for different rooms.

Pruning hurts. Pruning helps you to grow.
Sometimes the tiniest flowers smell the sweetest.
To everything there is a season. But know what season you are in.

Dream big. But try not to let ambition turn your joy into drudgery.
Grow what you love. The love will keep it growing.
Reap what you sow. But there will be surprises

Conflict Management Style

Each and everyone of us face conflicts, big and small, every day in our lives. Conflicts are anxiety provoking and can get easily escalated when you experience strong emotions. Each of us have a dominant style and a weaker style we unconsciously utilize to resolve conflicts. Being aware of what your dominant style will help to understand the pros and cons of using a particular conflict management style.


Check this document : It is a great resource that can be used to help clients identify their conflict management styles and also helps them to reflect on what is that they gain/lose by using that style. Each of the conflict management style has an animal associated with it. Symbolizing the style with animals  helps to give a visual of how it looks when you adopt that style

Turtle Avoiding I zig, you zag 

Turtles withdraw into their shells to avoid conflicts. This is their comfort zone and conflicts can be very anxiety provoking and withdrawing or avoiding is a coping mechanism to manage their anxiety.

OWL Collaborating I win, you win 

Owls highly value their own goals and also the relationships. Owls see conflicts as a means of improving relationships by reducing tensions between two persons.  Owls anxiety increases when there are unresolved conflicts and they cope with it by having an open communication about the conflict and expressing their perspectives while listening to the other persons perspective.

Shark Competing I win, you lose 

Sharks value their own goals and try to WIN the argument at all costs and are not present and thinking about the fracture they are causing in the relationships. Sharks believe that there has to be a winner and a loser in a conflict and their anxiety increases when they think they are losing an argument and they get aggressive in an effort to intimidate others and win the argument.

Teddy Bear Accommodating I lose, you win 

Teddy bears value their relationships more then their goals. Their anxiety increases in face of a conflict and they try to make peace at all cost, even giving up their own goals so things return back to normal and the conflict vanishes.

Fox Compromising You bend, I bend 

Foxes are moderately value with their own goals and their relationship with others. Foxes
seek a compromise by giving up something and encourage others to give up something in return so then can resolve the conflicts.

Kids Safety Assessment Tool

A picture is worth a thousand words.....

Image Source: Massachusetts Dept of Mental Health

Massachusetts Department of Mental Health has created a great set of safety tools to assess for children's safety in different situations like substance abuse and domestic violence.

Check this two page document  which has pictures to help children communicate their thoughts and feelings in an effective way.

• Trigger Tools: What makes you feel upset? 
• Warning Sign Tools: What happens to my body when I am angry, scared or upset?
• Safety Tools: What helps you feel better?

You can add personalized tools that are specific to your client as well.

Virginia Satir's Self-Care Domains

It is common for most of us to think of self-care as a one dimensional aspect. Virginia Satir's has described self-care in 8 different domains and when in balance creates a healthy mind and a health body. A great tool for clinicians to do a self-evaluation to avoid burnout. Also a great tool that can be used to explore client's self-care actions.

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Source: laveldanaylor.wordpress.com

Trauma and Healing

Below are a list of books which are very informative and is a wonderful medium to talk about difficult things with children in a language they can understand.

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Please Tell: A Child's Story About Sexual Abuse by Jessie ottenweller (Author)

Please Tell! is a beautifully simple book with a profoundly important message for children who have been sexually abused: the abuse wasn't their fault. Written and illustrated by Jessie, herself a pre-teen survivor of sexual abuse, it tells kids just what to do to get the help they need."

Kristin A. Kunzman, abuse therapist and author of The Healing Way: Adult Recovery from Childhood Sexual Abuse

Source : Amazon.com 

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Sarah's Waterfall: A Healing Story about Sexual Abuse by Ellery Akers (Author), Angelique Benicio (Illustrator)

Sarah, an elementary-school-age survivor of sexual abuse, has come to live with her beloved grandmother. Sarah's Waterfall tells the story of Sarah's year of healing, in her own words. The story unfolds as journal entries beginning with the start of the school year at a new school, as Sarah joins a girls survivors group led by the school psychologist. Sarah makes friends with another young survivor, Paula, who has frizzy hair, a whole bunch of pets, and a great sense of humor. Surrounded by Gram's safe and loving presence, Sarah can begin to heal and enjoy life again. As the year unfolds, she writes poems, develops her first close friendship, gains new skills to overcome her past, and at her counselor's encouragement, draws beautiful waterfalls as a symbol of her health and wholeness. Through her journal, Sarah also describes some of the healing exercises used in her survivors group at school. Gorgeous color illustrations support Sarah s story.

Source : Amazon.com

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 The Courage to Heal (Author: Ellen Bass and Laura Davis)

Come to terms with your past while moving powerfully into the future

The Courage to Heal is an inspiring, comprehensive guide that offers hope and a map of the healing journey to every woman who was sexually abused as a child—and to those ho care about her. Although the effects of child sexual abuse are long-term and severe, healing is possible.

Source : Amazon.com 

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There's No Such Thing as a Dragon (Author: Jack Kent)

When Billy Bixbee finds a tiny dragon in his bedroom, his mom tells him, “There’s no such thing as a dragon!” This only makes the dragon get bigger. He grows, and grows, and grows, until he’s bigger than Billy’s house—and that’s just the beginning!

Source : Amazon.com 

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Something Happened to me (Author: Phyllis E. Sweet)

To help children victimized by incest and other abuse 

Source: Amazon.com

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Something Happened And I'm Scared To Tell (Author: Patricia Kehoe)

With the help of a friendly lion, a young sexual abuse victim is able to talk about sexual abuse and recover self-esteem. Gentle and positive approach to reassure children.

Source: Amazon.com

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A Terrible Thing Happened (Author: Margaret M. Holme)

Sherman Smith saw the most terrible thing happen. At first he tried to forget about it, but soon something inside him started to bother him. He felt nervous for no reason. Sometimes his stomach hurt. He had bad dreams. And he started to feel angry and do mean things, which got hi m in trouble. Then he met Ms. Maple, who helped him talk about the ter rible thing that he had tried to forget. Now Sherman is feeling much b etter. This gently told and tenderly illustrated story is for childre n who have witnessed any kind of violent or traumatic episode, includi ng physical abuse, school or gang violence, accidents, homicide, suici de, and natural disasters such as floods or fire. An afterword by Sash a J. Mudlaff written for parents and other caregivers offers extensive suggestions for helping traumatized children, including a list of oth er sources that focus on specific events.

Source: Amazon.com 

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How Long Does It Hurt: A Guide to Recovering from Incest and Sexual Abuse for Teenagers, Their Friends, and Their Families (Author: Cynthia L. Mather)

Author is an Incest survivor and shares her story and recovery journey. "This step-by-step guide speaks directly to victims of sexual abuse¾to help them come to grips with what is happening to them and overcome their feelings of isolation, confusion, and self-doubt"

Source : Amazon.com 

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Explore Feelings With Young Children

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Sometimes I'm Bombaloo (Author: Rachel Vail)

Sometimes, Katie loses her temper.Sometimes she uses her feet and her fists instead of words. When Katie is this mad, she's just not herself. Sometimes, she's BOMBALOO. 

Being BOMBALOO is scary. But a little time-out and a lot of love calm BOMBALOO down and help Katie feel like Katie again!
   

Source: Amazon.com 

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Today I Feel Silly: And Other Moods That Make My Day (Author Jamie Lee Curtis)

 


Today I feel silly. Mom says it's the heat.
I put rouge on the cat and gloves on my feet.
I ate noodles for breakfast and pancakes at night.
I dressed like a star and was quite a sight.

Today I am sad, my mood's heavy and gray.
There's a frown on my face and it's been there all day.
My best friend and I had a really big fight.
She said that I tattled and I know that she's right.

Source: Amazon.com

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My Book Full of Feelings: How to Control and React to the Size of Your Emotions  (Author : Amy Jaffe and Luci Gardner )

This book is fully interactive. By using a dry-erase marker, unique situations and solutions can be added and changed with a wipe of a paper towel, as the child masters a skill and grows. Also included is a Communication Pad for tracking and sharing information between home and school an important component of effective programming. The book is great for all children, including those with Asperger Syndrome and other autism spectrum disorders.

Source: Amazon.com

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The Penguin Who Lost Her Cool: A Story About Controlling Your Anger (Author: Marla Sobel)

This unique series features an animal that loses the very thing he or she is know for, but then regains it with the help of simple, sound advice. In The Penguin Who Lost Her Cool, Penelope Penguin is a great student and a good friend, but sometimes she can't control her temper. She learns new anger control techniques, which help her control her temper and keep her friends.

Source: Amazon.com

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Double-Dip Feelings (Author : Barbara S. Cain)

This volume is designed to help children understand emotions, and shows that it is possible to experience two contrasting feelings at the same time, such as feeling both proud and scared on the first day of school. Questions are raised throughout the book to help them cope with the tugs and pulls of emotions that simultaneous and dissimilar feelings can produce. This second edition contains new illustrations.

 
Source: Amazon.com

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How are you feeling today?

This is a great chart to have in your office. Helps kids to build emotion vocabulary and a building block towards "I" Statements. This also helps them to understand and differentiate between a thought and feeling.

Source: Amazon.com, Kimochi