Conflict Management Style

Each and everyone of us face conflicts, big and small, every day in our lives. Conflicts are anxiety provoking and can get easily escalated when you experience strong emotions. Each of us have a dominant style and a weaker style we unconsciously utilize to resolve conflicts. Being aware of what your dominant style will help to understand the pros and cons of using a particular conflict management style.


Check this document : It is a great resource that can be used to help clients identify their conflict management styles and also helps them to reflect on what is that they gain/lose by using that style. Each of the conflict management style has an animal associated with it. Symbolizing the style with animals  helps to give a visual of how it looks when you adopt that style

Turtle Avoiding I zig, you zag 

Turtles withdraw into their shells to avoid conflicts. This is their comfort zone and conflicts can be very anxiety provoking and withdrawing or avoiding is a coping mechanism to manage their anxiety.

OWL Collaborating I win, you win 

Owls highly value their own goals and also the relationships. Owls see conflicts as a means of improving relationships by reducing tensions between two persons.  Owls anxiety increases when there are unresolved conflicts and they cope with it by having an open communication about the conflict and expressing their perspectives while listening to the other persons perspective.

Shark Competing I win, you lose 

Sharks value their own goals and try to WIN the argument at all costs and are not present and thinking about the fracture they are causing in the relationships. Sharks believe that there has to be a winner and a loser in a conflict and their anxiety increases when they think they are losing an argument and they get aggressive in an effort to intimidate others and win the argument.

Teddy Bear Accommodating I lose, you win 

Teddy bears value their relationships more then their goals. Their anxiety increases in face of a conflict and they try to make peace at all cost, even giving up their own goals so things return back to normal and the conflict vanishes.

Fox Compromising You bend, I bend 

Foxes are moderately value with their own goals and their relationship with others. Foxes
seek a compromise by giving up something and encourage others to give up something in return so then can resolve the conflicts.